Scroll smart: Eight real-world tips to help kids use social media safely

If you’re worried about what your kids might run into online, you’re not overreacting. Social media comes with plenty of unknowns — and once kids are on it, you can’t control everything they see or experience. But you can lower the risks. The key is staying informed, staying involved, and teaching kids how to protect themselves.

Here’s how to do that, without turning every conversation into a lecture.

1. Match privacy to age and maturity

Younger kids need more hands-on guidance. That may mean exploring platforms together or checking in regularly. Teens can handle more independence, but privacy should grow alongside trust and decision-making skills. You know your kids best — adjust as needed.

2. Make it a partnership, not a speech

Social media safety works best as a two-way conversation. Share what you’re learning, but ask what they know, too. What feels good online? What feels stressful? What makes them uneasy? When kids feel heard, they’re more likely to listen, to you and to their instincts.

3. Start with what’s working

Lead with validation. Social media often gives kids connection, creativity, and a sense of belonging. Try saying, “I get why this matters to you, and I’m glad it helps you stay connected.” That opens the door instead of shutting it.

4. Talk honestly about the risks

Follow up with transparency: “I won’t always be there when you’re online, so I want you to know about some real risks, and then let’s figure out how to handle them together.” Let them know you trust them which helps them develop trust in their own gut instincts. Framing it this way keeps the focus on teamwork.

5. Cover the non-negotiables

Help kids understand that not everyone online is honest — or safe. Ask what they think should stay private, then fill in the gaps. Basics include birthdates, addresses, school details, and real-time locations.

6. Get real about sharing

Many kids don’t realize that platforms can own their content, or that private messages can be screenshotted and shared. It’s important they understand that once something is sent or posted, it can travel fast and there’s no erasing it. Help them set strong privacy settings and think before they share.

7. Teach kindness that carries online

Family values don’t stop at the screen. Encourage kids to pause and ask themselves, “Would I say this in person?” Kindness, empathy, and accountability matter just as much online as they do face-to-face.

8. Check in on how it feels

Ask how social media affects them emotionally. Does it make them feel confident, inspired, stressed, or insecure? Stay curious and judgment-free so kids know they can come to you when something doesn’t feel right.

The takeaway

Don’t aim for total control — aim for learning and preparation. Co-create a clear safety plan with your kids so they know exactly what to do if someone makes them uncomfortable or unsafe online. Then keep checking in. Regular, open conversations are one of the strongest tools you have to help kids navigate social media with confidence and care.